Amanda Greever

There’s a war going on in this country, and it’s not on terror. Society is pitting fat girls against skinny girls.

It’s a theme you can find most anywhere. In the movie/play “Hairspray” Tracy Turnblad is shunned once she becomes part of the cast on “The Corny Collins Show.” Her weight is at the center of the storyline, as she falls for the leading man. Unfortunately, the fact that Tracy is twice his size hints that her heart might end up broken.

Yes, there are men out there who won’t look twice at a woman that isn’t a size two. At the same time, there are men that are all about the big, beautiful women and are turned off by a woman that is the size of a stick. Then there is my favorite type of guy: the one that likes ‘em all. It’s not exactly like he sees him them as a smorgasbord as an old Elvis song suggests but he likes his women of any shape or size, but how can you really argue with a guy that doesn’t care if you’re short or tall?

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve helped the fat vs. thin fight when I’ve looked at a woman half my size and thought that I could snap her like a twig if I really wanted to. And then I’ve looked at women that were bigger than me and thanked my lucky stars that I wasn’t that size. It’s not something I’m proud of but it’s an ugly cycle that’s hard to break.

And now as if there weren’t enough problems already, we have reality shows cultivating the size differences of the women in this country. The new FOX show “More to Love” follows “one regular guy” in his search for love. Luke Conley, who according to FOX’s web site stands 6’3 and over 300 pounds, is looking for Miss Right. It’s a show in the style of “The Bachelor” but his choices are all what the Web site calls “curvy” or “voluptuous”.

The commercial noted that most reality TV stars are a size two while the average woman is a size 14 or above. So this show is all about letting the average woman find love, according to the commercial. I agree that a size two is not exactly your girl next door. But she’s not exactly a size 20 either. You guy next door is exactly a svelte toned hunk of burning love but he isn’t necessarily over 300 pounds either.

Reality shows have long fostered the notion of the hot, thin girls trying to capture a guy’s heart. Think about it: could you really picture Bret Michaels looking twice at a size 14? Of course not. The only thing that should be big on Bret’s girls are their cup size. So yes, he likes the skinny girls with a lot of silicone. In fact, most of the girls on the reality TV shows that involve Mr. Right looking for love could probably be broken over my knee.

Does that mean that we have to have to have a show that features a man with a pot belly looking for love with women that won’t be flattened by him? Do we really need another show that emphasizes women that aren’t skinny? Don’t “The Biggest Loser” and “Dance Your Ass Off” do that enough for us already?

What ever happened to the days of Jack Spratt and his wife? Since when is love based on size? So what if “The Bachoelor” is nice and toned and looking for love among women who are pretty nicely shaped themselves? Is the alternative really to make a show featuring a bachelor who could stand to lose a few pounds looking for love that FOX chooses to call curvy? Couldn’t there be a skinny girl in there, too? Or maybe a “curvy” girl in the mix on “The Bachelor” show?

Maybe I’m naive, but I thought the shows were about finding love. I didn’t realize that love came down to a tape measure and a scale. Oh well, I’ve been wrong before.

I was flipping through the TV channels this week on my quest to find something to kill a few brain cells with and I stumbled across a new reality show “Hitched or Ditched.”

With a name like that, the main premise behind the show isn’t hard to figure out, but I’ll elaborate further. The producers of this crap show find a longtime couple and give them a week to plan the wedding of their dreams. Here’s the catch, though: the couple is already on rocky ground and the wedding might not actually happen. That decision isn’t made until they’re up in front of their friends and family and it’s time to say “I do.”

I just caught the tail end of the episode, thankfully. It centered around a couple that had been together for a while but hadn’t taken the plunge. She wanted to be able to go out and have a good time at the bars with her friends, and he’d rather she stay at home, even going so far as to try to take her home from her bachelorette party. (She said no, by the way.) Seems another drink or three was her downfall as our groom told her how beautiful she was and how he loved her with all his heart but he just couldn’t marry her. Really, guys, don’t butter us up with flattery when you’re going to rip out our hearts and grind them up. Thanks in advance.

Another episode apparently features an interracial couple that is fighting to get the approval of their families because they’re from the South and that sort of thing is “really not acceptable.” The review I found said, his mother even called the bride-to-be “the white devil.” I wonder if she has separate water fountains and bathrooms for them to use, too.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m sure that heartbreak and tears on national TV is something that can pull viewers in. After all, we watch men get involved with 15+ women and dwindle the number down to one, after he’s tested all of them out. But relationships are hard enough without complicating them even further.

I’m horrible in relationships. I’ll be the first to admit it. I’m terrified of commitment and really have to stop myself from destroying relationships on purpose. Shows that capitalize on heartbreak and ruin don’t exactly make me feel warm and fuzzy.

There are couples in California fighting for the right to be married, an opportunity that got pushed further away as the California Supreme Court voted to uphold Proposition 8, an initiative first passed in November that would ban same-sex marriages. Of course, the divorce rate between heterosexual couples is 50 percent and probably going to rise. Marriage is becoming something to fear and avoid.

Weddings are supposed to be joyous, happy occasions. They’re supposed to be something that couples look forward to as they ponder their vows, who to invite, etc. They’re something little girls dream about. But the older the little girl gets and the more society progresses, the more marriage doesn’t seem all it’s cracked up to be.

Aren’t there enough problems in the world without TV producers trying to capitalize on the pain and suffering caused as a couple gives up its fight to find happiness? What’s next — we’ll have cameras in the divorce proceedings of Jon and Kate? Think we’ll have their eight kids in the room so that we can see their tears as Mommy and Daddy split up?

I like my reality TV as much as the next person, but I think that this show dishes it up a bit too cold for me.

Better late than never, right?

So last week was disco-themed and it wasn’t just the spinning disco ball making me a little nauseous. Two contestants were slated for elimination this week after the judges’ foolhardy move to save the not-so-fan-favorite Matt Giraud the week before. My thoughts were Matt should have gone on home, but I was certain that he would  be sent packing a second time, but with Lil Rounds in tow.

Lil opened disco week with Chaka Khan’s “I’m Every Woman”, sporting another wig. Seriously, have we seen her real hair in weeks? The performance was actually a little fun if you overlooked the fact that she still yells her high notes that I’m fairly certain she could probably hit without bellowing. But the performance wasn’t original nor was it a make-you-stand-up-and-say-WOW moment. Then again, most of this year’s batch of contestants isn’t capable of such. But hey Lil, great job with the karaoke!

Up next, we had Kris Allen performing “She Works Hard for the Money.” The more I see of Kris, the more I think he might make it to the finals. He stripped the song down to a bare bones acoustic version. Yes, it sounded a little bit like songs he’s done in the past, but that’s his sound. He has that thing. OK, maybe it’s just because he’s adorable with whatever he sings. Even with that funny facial gesture he makes when he goes for a long note.

Mr. Danny Gokey covered “September” from Earth, Wind & Fire. Again, another fun performance, at least for me. I’ve been a Danny fan from the beginning but I have to wonder what type of album he would make if he wins. The world doesn’t need another Taylor Hicks. The problem with Idol is the winner basically has to do what corporate Idol wants. It’s this logic that made me realize last  year that David Cook might be better off if he DIDN’T win. Of course, I still voted for him because I really, really didn’t want to see David “I sing ballads and want to save the world” Archuleta win.  At least Danny didn’t try to dance this week.

Allison Iraheta took “Hot Stuff” to a different place when she slowed the tune down.  It was definitely more rock than disco, which generally isn’t a bad thing. The girl can rock the house, but I’m not sure this was one of her best performances. She gave the song an original spin, but it was a little awkward for me. Sure, she showed off her rocker-chick side, but doesn’t she always? In some ways, she reminds me of last year’s winner, Mr. Cook, in the fact that he could take a song and make it his own, i.e. “Hello.” However, he knew when to stay a little closer to the original. Imagine if you will a rocking version of “Music of the Night.” Andrew Lloyd Webber would have gone up on stage and taken the microphone. Some reworkings really just don’t work.

Speaking of reworking, Adam Lambert also slowed down his song: “If I Can’t Have You.” Ah, Mr. Lambert certainly can sing a ballad. The lights were low, he was wearing a suit, Paula Abdul was holding back tears. What a way to set a scene. His end note was gorgeous, a falsetto but sweet and pure rather than screaming. What I liked was the fact that Adam didn’t take credit for the originality of the song. When a song is really reworked, he gives credit where credit is due. Such a nice fellow.  Here’s the interesting thing … when Adam does a ballad, he rockets to the top of the contestants. However, when he goes wild such as the use of a sitar on “Ring of Fire,” his popularity wanes. So does Adam stick with ballads to get the voters to stick with him or does he stay true to himself and do whatever he feels like? At this point, he might have viewers glued to their phones regardless of what he does.

Matt got cute with his song, picking “Staying Alive.” How’s that for wishful thinking? I’m not a Matt fan but this one was fun. It was pretty karaoke-ish for me though.  Simon Cowell agreed with me. I was pretty certain that this song wouldn’t be enough to keep Matt alive in the competition. But when your favorite is at elimination’s door, fans clamor to their phones. Even a few fans with a tricky dialing finger can keep a not-as-popular contestant in the running.

Anoop Desai performed “Dim All the Lights.” Lord, I was bored. Sure, it was kind of pretty at first, and I did like Anoop’s gray and pink ensemble, but fashion decisions don’t move you through the competition. Besides the shoes he paired with the outfit were hideous, but I digress. Even when the song picked up, I was just as bored. Simon wasn’t impressed either. The performance was just OK for me.

With two going home, I was pretty sure one would be Lil. I just wasn’t sure if her traveling companion would be Matt or Anoop. It turned out that Matt was to going to perform one more week. Good riddance to both Lil and Anoop. However, Matt will only last  until this week when America gets their next chance to get rid of him. The four that will be left WILL be the best this season had to offer. The problem is I kind of like all of them so I won’t really want to see anyone go. However, I think the top three will end up Kris, Adam and Danny.  Sorry Allison but your rock star will burn out before the finals.

It’s my blog and I’ll judge if I want to, judge if I want to, judge if I want to. You would judge, too if you had a blog, too!

So the American Idol judges have one save that they can use all season long. One teeny, weeny little get-out-of-jail free card that they can play to keep a contestant from being eliminated. So this week, the judges finally pull out their save to keep Matt Giraud, the man they call the next Justin Timberlake. That could be an insult or a compliment, depending on your preference.  

This week’s theme was music of the movies, featuring mentor Quentin Tarentino. Matt chose “Have You Ever Really Loved a Woman,” a Bryan Adams hit from the Johnny Depp flick “Don Juan DeMarco.” The judges weren’t impressed with his performance or rather his re-working of the song. For me, Matt’s decent.  He’s not fabulously remarkable or anything. But here’s what baffles me, after the judges had deliberated on him, judge Simon Cowell actually admitted to our fearful contestant that he didn’t think he could win. Yet they use the save anyway? That makes a lot of sense, doesn’t it? Oh well, next week that just means that two will have to go. My picks: Matt and Lil Rounds.

Speaking of Lil, they hated her version of “The Rose.” For me, it was a semi-solid performance. Lil can sing. She knows it, and we know it. This was probably my favorite Lil performance thus far because she actually took a chance and tried to shake things up a little, something the judges have been encouraging her to do all season. Maybe it was just the fact that she finally didn’t shout a song. Yes, there’s a difference between belting out a song and simply yelling it. Lil has yet to learn that difference. Also, what’s up with those wigs? If she hates her short hair so much, perhaps it was a mistake to cut her hair so short?

Hmm, might as well touch on some others while I’m being all judgemental.

Ah, Allison Iraheta. I’ve been a fan of hers since the beginning but I’m not sure she can actually pull out a win overall. Her version of “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing” was lacking for me. I hate pulling out the youth card with her. Yes, she’s 16 but that doesn’t mean she can’t put feeling behind a song. However, with this one, there was no emotion in her performance at all. Really, Allison, is there no one you want to stay with in a moment forever? Could you not fake it?  The performance was sound but just OK for me.

Anoop Desai took a song I’ve loved for  years and tried to ruin it for me. “Another Bryan Adams track “Everything I Do (I Do It for You) from the Kevin Costner flick “Robin Hood.” Sigh, this is one of the most romantic songs I can remember from a movie soundtrack. Maybe it’s just because I was young and impressionable when it came out. The song was sweet and full of love. During their mentoring session, Quentin told Anoop he needed to roughen the song up. I’m not sure Anoop can do rough because his Idol performance came out whiny and a little pathetic. It didn’t come across as sentimental. Instead, it seemed Anoop was begging and trying to convince a woman of his feelings. Kind of kills the romance for me. The judges were wild about it, but I thought it was a weak performance.

Danny Gokey, I think I might love you. Maybe it’s just the glasses. I’ve always had a thing for men in glasses so I could be swayed by that. His choice for the night was “Endless Love.” Sigh, Danny is at his best when he pulls out a ballad.  There was no question that Danny was feeling strong feelings when he sang it. Yes, he was thinking of his late wife, and I defy anyone to say to me he’s using his wife’s death for publicity. As he looked upward to Heaven on his final notes, I couldn’t help but get a little teary right along with him. Even my best gal pal called it the best performance of the night and she’s a diehard Adam Lambert fan. 

Speaking of Adam, he truly was “Born to be Wild” as his song suggests. Adam is a performer that generally people love him or hate him. When he performs a ballad like “Tracks of My Tears,” he steals the show. But the problem is, Adam isn’t just a balladeer. He’s a performer, an artist. To get the ballads, you have to take the over-the-top theatrical performances that have flashing lights and ear-piercing falsettos. For the die-hard fans, those are all part of what makes Adam Adam. For me, they’re a bit much.  Yes, the man can sing, and yes, I believe AI is his to lose. He’s entertaining, if nothing else.

Last night but not least, we have Kris Allen. This cutie went with an obscure song from a slightly obscure movie: “Falling Slowly” from the movie “Once.” Kris consistently pulls off the sweetest performance of the night. I’m not sure if it’s just because he’s absolutely adorable or because his songs are cute. Come on, “How Sweet It Is to Be Loved By You” was sooo cute. His little blonde wife seems to fit him perfectly. This week’s performance was just OK for me though. It might have been its obscurity or perhaps the fact that it just wasn’t really the best song for Kris’ voice. I think Kris could go far in this competition.

Ah, if Simon or Paula ever get tired of judging AI, I hope they’ll look my way for a replacement.

The day I’d been waiting for finally arrived. Last year’s “American Idol” winner David Cook hit The Square Room in Knoxville. I’d been ready for the concert for weeks. No, I never managed to land an interview with him after my initial one was canceled. But he didn’t cancel the show — although I kept waiting for that announcement.

I tried to race through my day at The Daily Times. My best gal pal and I had decided to grab dinner before the show, and the doors opened at 6:30 p.m. No, I wasn’t going to try to be waiting and ready, but I didn’t want to get there at the last minute either. Unfortunately all my racing still help me beat Mother Nature as she dumped rain on me, leaving me looking like a soggy rat as we made it to will call to get our tickets. The weather also meant we weren’t going far for dinner.

I have to admit that I was chomping at the bit as I ate my Tomato Head pizza. I knew that David Cook was just next door. I knew he was probably rehearsing for his show.  And I knew that I was going to see him perform really soon. I had gone with a friend to see the 2008 American Idol tour last August, and for me, David had been the highlight. He only did five songs though — this was going to be just him.

The show finally started at 9, but my wait still wasn’t over. David’s opening act was Ryan Star, of “Rock Star INXS” reality TV fame. He wasn’t bad, and my friend thought he was awesome. I thought he was kind of hot, but for me his voice had a young Neil Diamond thing going on. I really, really wanted him to break into “Sweet Caroline.” Alas, I was left wanting on that one.

When David hit the stage, all thoughts of Ryan and “Sweet Caroline” disappeared. This was David Cook’s night. I remember watching “American Idol” last year knowing DC had star quality. His takes on Lionel Richie’s “Hello” and even Mariah Carey’s “Always Be My Baby” showed he had a little something special to offer. Watching him own that stage Friday night gave me a special thrill.

He worked the crowd, slowing things down at times and rocking the house at others. I didn’t even think of laughing when the beginning notes of his new single “Come Back to Me” began. Thanks to the morning show at Star 102.1, I can’t help but think of “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer” when the song comes on the radio or my iTunes. The beginnings really are similar …

Even though we were packed in, I gotta say I didn’t notice. Although the show wasn’t as long as I had thought it would be, I was completely entertained. I took turns taking pictures with my friend’s camera and my cell phone. I was determined to get at least one good pic (or fifteen).

I’m not sure if it was his music or just him that wowed me. I’ve been a DC fan for a long time. Maybe it wasn’t him singing the songs I’ve come to enjoy. Maybe it wasn’t his talent as a singer and musician. Maybe it was just him, period. Whatever it was, I’m ready to see Mr. Cook again.

A friend sent me a link to a video featuring 47-year-old Susan Boyle, a singing hopeful on “Britain’s Got Talent.” (Check her out for yourself.) She reminded me of a relative that comes to visit and always pinches your cheek. She was jolly, frumpy and slightly eccentric. Her amusement at life was infectious, and I had to wonder if perhaps she had snuck a nip of sherry before her audition.

At first, I thought my friend was trying to make a pointed remark about crazy cat ladies when Susan lamented the fact that she had never been married or even kissed and lives alone with her cat, Pebbles. Hey, two of those three could apply to me. So I paused my video and inquired about the wiseness of comparing me to a potentially crazy cat lady. He was baffled at my calling Susan “crazy” and suggested I keep watching.

The judges didn’t quite know what to make of Susan’s sturdy gait or the fact that she wiggled her hips suggestively when she told them her age. She gave off a confidence no one expected, and I was with the judges when they balked at her desire to become the next Elaine Paige, a major star of musical theatre. When she told them she was going to sing “I Dreamed a Dream” from Les Miserables, I was convinced I was in for something akin to the bad auditions on “American Idol.” After all, there was no way this woman could ever dream of nailing that song, right?

Wrong.

When Susan opened her mouth and let those first notes drift out, my mouth opened (or should I say dropped) as well. She didn’t just own the song, but the stage, the judges and the audience. She smirked just before she began and looking back, I realize it was because she knew she was about to hush those who’d doubted her. There’s something about making others eat crow that is a little fun, and Susan served up a heaping plate of it. She hit all the notes — high and low — and she knew it. Here was this lady that hadn’t exactly had a fair shake in life, and we all judged her because of it — and she knew it. She knew her appearance and behavior didn’t offer a lofty opinion of her.

The lyrics of the song added to the moment. They speak of dreams being dashed and stepped on. Yet the singer still hopes to find that soul-mate with whom to face all of life’s trials and triumphs. But by the end, the singer has realized that some dreams just don’t come true. I’ll admit it: I was crying before Susan was through.

I cried because this woman had wowed her critics and found a small piece of glory. She tried to leave the stage right after her song. It was as if she had done what she intended to do and whatever the judges might say was inconsequential. I cried as the irony of her song choice set in. OK, I cried because of the song, period. I cried as judge Piers Morgan called her song “… stunning. An incredible performance.” Judge Simon Cowell called it “extraordinary.”

And I cried as Susan reeled from the fact that all three judges had given her three yeses and she was on the next round. She was blown away and couldn’t help but cry. I have to admit that I’m a little ashamed of myself for assuming the worst of this woman based on her looks and background. And yet during this audition, Susan wasn’t a matronly spinster who had never married or been kissed. She wasn’t the crazy cat lady who lives next door with Pebbles.  Despite her performance, she wasn’t even just a singer. Even for a brief moment, Susan Boyle was a star.